Hello marshmallows( just because it rhymed with hello :-( ) .
Such a weird week! It started of with me waking up to the news of a short circuit leading to fire in the basement of my college and ended up with our department winning the "best dept award". We've experienced all sorts of emotions in this turmoil.
So on Friday, mum dragged me to watch a movie she'd been longing to watch for quite sometime now. As I tell the person at the ticket counter to give me 2 seats preferably the ones at the side, he looks up at me... And his face suddenly starts resembling the "smug" looking emoji. Then this "mental conversation" follows. Mental meaning I imagined how it would go.
Tick.guy: 2 side seats eh? I smell louuuv..
Me: the joke is on you! I'm here with mommy
Tg: the joke is still on you... Forever alone..
As I couldn't think of a witty reply I decide to not iniate this weird mental convo...but I sooo wanted to. Don't you have those weird moments when your mind is crazy witty, when you want to publish all your thoughts because you just find them so funny. But being a pucca coward, I'm never up for such challenges.
This weekend, as I was coming back home, we (mum,dad and me) get stuck in a traffic jam. So what's new? Traffic and Mumbai roads go hand in hand.. But this was weird because it was a very local gullee that was jam packed, not a highway. And that was because of a marriage procession.
Most Indian weddings follow this tradition. They have the groom, face hidden by Jasmine gajras hanging vertically from his forehead, seated on a white horse. And all the baratees (groom's relatives) dancing frantically to songs played by a band dressed in red suits .
( if you are an Indian, you might have pictured this with a background score like "aaj mere yaar ki shadi hai" or "emotional atyachaar" version: instrumental)
Well I have one question. How and why would someone voluntarily put themselves in such an embarrassing situation?! And what is this weird obsession girls have .. I want my man to come to my place on a white horse . I just don't get it. I would rather take to celibacy than getting married to a man who doesn't look down upon this cruel ghodi-business. Had I been the horse, I'd have dropped the groom and kicked a few human asses dancing right in the middle of the street.
Every procession here is just like the one described above. Be it a festive one, where people carry idols or the bridegroom one.
And it's like they assume it's their birthright to create a jam.
" Apna kaam banta, bhaad mein jae janta"
On their way back to the groom's place, i.e. after the ceremony, the bride also joins them. So you have a very coy looking dulhan, a very uncomfortable dulha and a horde of crazy relatives, the Unclejees throwing currency notes on the too-much-into-dancing youngsters . It's so absurd. Yet it's a very common practice here.
Sigh..girls and their weird obsession.
Even Taylor Swift is obsessed..
" That I'm not a princess,
this ain't a fairy tale,
I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet, Lead her up the stairwell
This ain't Hollywood,
this is a small town,
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down,
Now it's too late for you and your white horse to come around"
- Appiqué<3
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