((Okay old one with some new points.
I really wanted to post something. So this.
Also an apology for disappearing with some cute surprises (seriously?) coming up. So stay tuned.
Shut up already!?!?
Ok here goes ))
Hey girly.
No, don't worry it isn't a post just for women. Guys can sit back and read too. And enjoy as we girls, open up to the world and tell them we are guilty, guilty as hell.
And also watch as I seemingly transform into a hypocrite as I go against my own post titled " Nice Guys ".
Now I say seemingly because I believe and mean every word of what I said in the nice guys post. But sometimes, we also tend to falter and start walking in the wrong direction... But most of us are sensible enough to turn before crossing half the distance in that forbidden lane.
As much as we refuse that we don't do this, there is a point in every nice, decent, sober girl's life where she falls for some guy who isn't nice. Fall could also mean a temporary and very tiny crush, but enough to spark a small fire in the heart.
Girls, you know what I'm talking about. You know those seemingly dark guys. Not complexion, personality. They have something extremely mysterious about them. A deep past or a completely weird secret but something that acts as a magnet and pulls you towards them.
All your life your mum's been telling you," drinking is bad. Smoking is bad. Sex is a sin. Abusive words take you to hell." You might deny but you judge others when they do all this. But suddenly this guy does it and it is okay. You are ready to forget his extra long list of past girlfriends, his encounters with women, those moments you catch him flirting with other women as long as he is ready to commit to you.
For " good" girls , this guy is sort of a reward guinea pig. You take it in your hands to repair him, only if you knew better.
One, you fall for a person, you fall for what they have to offer. Then you can't go about thinking that you'd change them. That's wrong. Probably one or two wrong habits, but depends on your and the world's definition of wrong. Two... If only you knew he likes looking broken and he is not. And even if this possibility is doing rounds in your head, you still dive in, with everything you have worth offering.
Now some guys are genuinely dark but nice on the inside. But most of these live in novels.
There are so many "bad" boys that try to incorporate the "bad" boy image just to become a chick magnet. Now these are guys that seem stand-off-ish and dark to the world but say nice things to you often, offer to carry your books around if you are hurt, help you out at times and do a lot of sugar talking. A lot. A hell lot. Everyone warns you to keep safe distance from this guy and before you know it, you may deny all you want... But you fall for him and all his cheesy-ness. Those cheeky pick-up lines start pushing your heart to do a somersault and you come to a point where you can absolutely not stop talking to him. He becomes your daily cuppa coffee, you need that Gm and Gn. And he'll go to heights to tell you how much of efforts he is putting into the "secret" relation of yours. Secret as he keeps expressing his love unabashedly and you deny to save face.
And then you crash as you see him with someone else... A cousin/an ex/ a gf/ a just-a-friend/ an acquaintance and they are just communicating with too much of physical contact with faces barely allowing an atom of oxygen to pass by.
He refuses to acknowledge you in front of his friends, infront of the chick you caught him with. He calls you "just a friend" to cover.
You denied all you could and now you break. Shatter into tiny pieces. Like a glass vase. And you can't tell anybody because you denied it all. People will be bad at sympathizing. Infact most of it would sound like," Ha, I told you so. He's a Casanova."
And nobody wants to hear that when they are about to breakdown.
Identification tip: A bad boy is an "asshole" not a "douche" in today's terminology. He is rude to some, he comes off as standoff-ish or arrogant not downright wannabeish or annoying. If he's annoying he is not your "bad" boy. If his messages make you go "Ugh it's you, again.. Why don't you take a hint and buzz off" instead of "Omg why is he messaging :-o *hyperventilating*" followed by a skip in the heartbeat.. Then he isn't your bad boy.
Bad boy attraction isn't wrong. But all you need to do is be careful. Sometimes they take you to a stage where it is beyond repair. Sometimes you find out before anything really develops. It's how good you are at holding yourself, at being uptight. If you cling to any kind of support you get like a desperate person, then Lord save you!
These guys are the reasons why nice guys start believing that you need to be a jerk to get a girl. But trust me, if she's sensible, she's going to come straight to you after coming back to her senses, which is a good thing because now that she knows, her choice will be someone who's more permanent, someone that actually seems to have a heart and blood flowing through his veins rather than a venomous leech that would not only suck the life out of you but also leave you bitter and sore enough to not trust anyone, build a cage that only nice guys would not fear tearing down. All the shallowness would be gone.
The overall If i knew how and what it was then I wouldn't be jealous teaches you a lot about yourself, but at the cost of an ensuing depressing period .
Nice guys will be nice guys. You can't replace them. And you absolutely can not "not love" them.
