Random thoughts haul 2:

Just a collection of many thoughts I thought were worth penning/qwerty-ing down.

Isn't Facebook screwing up our language?
Facebook gives u an "unlike" option and unlike means dissimilar. :-/
It allows you to " friend " people not befriend. Not saying friend is wrong, but most of the kids haven't heard of the word befriend!

Thought 2. You may have come across the story of the hare and the turtle. The moral was slow and steady wins the race. But what if there was a third wheel, I mean like a third person in that race. He would have won if he could run faster than the turtle. So shouldn't the moral be, " You snooze, you lose." or something of that sort.

So my friend and I were discussing about this movie " 500 days of Summer" .
(I have to give it to him! I would not have seen it this way had we not had that convo.)
So...if you haven't seen it, a heads-up- it is NOT a romantic movie. And it has Zooey Deschannel in it.  (<3)

The movie is sad. It hits you, it walks right up to where you are sitting/standing and slams a hand on your face. Bammm! That hard.

The first time you watch it, you'll be like " that was shit." and then it hits you. The movie and all the sense it makes. It grows slowly taking its time to enlighten small portions of your mind till it's burning with realization.

That movie,  it is....
It's about how a relation goes bad, it's how you sulk in a shit hole for days and days. It's how you wonder if you and your ex could get back together. It's about how ex-es can be jerks at time and give you a teeny-tiny feeling that they might be ready to get back. It's about how something kicks you right in your gut when you see that "hope inducing" ex with their new love interest. It's about how you start comparing each and every detail of the newbie to you and calculating their weakness-es and your strengths and how you are better or worse and drop lower and lower as a human.

You go to the ends of the world stalking their bf/gf,  seeing and checking last seens of the ex and their new partners,  checking the likes on their pictures esp pictures featuring both of them. You lower your worth comparing yourself to people you most often barely know. And even if you do, you are you. The only one of your kind. It's a shame we degrade ourselves like this. And why just these, we do that when we discover our crushes are committed too, don't we?
If you say no, either you are God or you're lying. But then what's the use of lying to yourself.

And in the end, that movie is about how life goes on.  How if it does not feel even 0.0001% right it's not meant to be.
She knows it's the one when she meets her husband. And  any number of fights, arguments, difference of taste and opinion can't make a difference to the feeling of knowing this is that one person. This is something I want to treasure n go to the ends of world for. This is someone I don't want to let go off.

There is a population of 7 billion people on the planet and we've just possibly bumped into 1000-2000 of them. Hope.

There's this movie I was watching,  its name I can't recollect. There's this particular line that caught my attention.
" We know it(love) is special. Hence we do everything possible to hold on to it. Because we believe that something so magical could only happen once. But that's not true. There will be someone who will see how amazing you are. Love will knock again."

Ahh, made you sad/yawn?  Sorry.
Until I stock up enough thoughts to make a post, Take care.  :-)
  - Appiqué <3

Gilli danda induced retardation:

(WARNING: the following post may be toooo boring, but that is how this post is going to be. So DEAL with it)
Hello. Or should I say, WTH is wrong with you? Shame on you. Go drown yourself!...?

What is wrong with the world? Specifically my country today.
Going crazy is one thing, going way past retard is another. Never go full retard, especially when you have a choice.

People have sort of realized that they can do absolutely anything when they put their heart in it or set a goal or something, but brothers, all your energy is directed in the most shittiest direction.

I'm not going to be careful about my choice of words because people here aren't careful of their behavior. If I were internet sensation superwoman , I'd put it like this:" these people are bloody garbage!"

So why am I angry? T20 ended yesterday. And I still don't give a horse's ass about sports. I suck at it, if you don't, I have immense respect for you. But then that's it. Like don't come to me expecting I'd go, "I saw the match and.. Blah blah.." cause I haven't and I won't be.  So this ends yesterday and a cricketer's house is stone pelted because people " suspect" he was into match fixing.
Do you want a chittar to your head?

Now I don't know much about sports or even this match fixing news but even if people do, it doesn't give them the authority to go shake up someone's place. It's disappointing to see how people take law into their hands...esp when it comes to sports and in India, cricket. Cricket is like a religion here. People breathe gilli danda. It's such a let down to see the mob do such things, mob consisting of the people who went on a "fast"-ing spree and organized poojas and havans when the cricketer got diagnosed with cancer. It also makes you realize how fast people judge you- you please them for years, stand up to match each and every expectation of theirs but one fault...and boom! You get royally screwed and your reputation tarnished for the rest of your life.

Here people's mindset is such that they tend to give issues hardly holding worth in their life a much higher priority than the ones that require immediate and abundant attention.Why do they act laid back when issues concerning their life or future are at stake?

There are these so called "elected" " leaders" that we read of in the papers. They are into big time scandals, huge cases, get bailed out of jail every other week and what do we do? We don't give a shit. That's right. You heard me! Zilch. That's how much we care.

Someone gets raped/abused/molested.. You see some kind of injustice happening- domestic violence or gender bias... What do you do? Nothing. That's none of my business. I don't want to get involved in anything that needs me to be a witness and/or give a statement of some sorts. Why huge cases, take mini ones. You see old people getting ill-treated , what do you do."tch tch tch" . This also if you aren't too self absorbed.
Here's what happened at the malls yesterday. My parents were at some mall and there was no space to sit and eat. The food court was full of people just occupying stalls and seats so they could watch the match. And when others started complaining of not having any place to sit and enjoy a meal, the manager told them that the crowd had threatened to break down the mall if they were forced to get up. :|. So all the people with heavy shopping bags, kids, pregnant ladies, senior citizens... All of them were left without seats and with food trays in their hand.  Even langars have better provision man!

Seriously angry mob people, channelize your anger and eenergy better. Contest an election or something. You seem to have a fair "watt/auda/authority" , all your "contacts" seem VIPish and really important. Like please. We'd be glad to have a leader who can bring about some change.

And I really like how you work, " I don't like this. We bash this shit" . I know work's going to get "done" faster when you rise to power.
:-D
.
.
.
:-|

And as far as sports are concerned, to be good at a sport you need to have talent and loads of practice. So imagine being a part of something so huge like the Indian Cricket team. Sounds tough and intimidating, doesn't it? Some days you play well, sometimes you don't. Just like our favorite actors- some movies fare well, some don't even last for a week. So what? We burn their houses down, stop watching all their future releases?

 Everyone has a slump period. You, office-goer, I'm sure you have missed a deadline once... Let's be honest here, who are we kidding; ten times? Hmm. Now that we are on the same page, does your boss send people to burn your house down? 'Cause if he does that, that'll be way too mature a decision on his part. Seriously that's a great way to deal with things we don't like- destroy it!

Quoting a maxi clad Bandra aunty " Eh, you need to Grow up, men!"
  -Appiqué <3

Random boredom updates

So what do you call a person who walks into a lit room, switches off the light and stands in complete darkness trying to recollect why the hell he walked into that room in the first place? Stupid. NO…..you call the person- me! :\

Hello , hie! 

Of recent I’ve been soooo lost and clueless. I walk into closed doors, bed edges, chairs, people and my recent achievement –dogs!!! I was so engrossed as I walked out of the station that I failed to notice a dog and I tripped over it. You could say it was more of an obstacle race because I jumped over it and then stood there trying to let it sink in, the moment that had just passed and how petrified I was. I literally paused for a good 2 mins, hand clasped over my mouth and all the people passing by looked at me like they expected me to break into a solo gig over there …you know like some entertainer, because the catch was that I was wearing my street play t-shirt.

Today I was trying to lift my bag and picture me trying to do that sitting on a chair. And the chair did a back flip. :/

I mean seriously? What is wrong with me or the objects around me…

What if the objects have signed a pact to make me fall or trip on them because I (unknowingly) hurt a member of their clan?

I also absolutely love the people who are sooo spontaneous at times. I’ve a friend who was so bored that she agreed to jump into the next rickshaw and come to my place! Looove her for that. Things like these are getting me through these retarded days of mine where my furniture is trying to sabotage my day with all the nasty lil’ things like coming in my way, growing a little taller…I don’t know. There is another possibility that I may be as clumsy as shit but let’s stick to the furniture theory as it sounds better.

The funny part (disclaimer: only I may find it funny) is that my mum went to this astrologist when I was 14 and he tried predicting about me; so he said your daughter is really clumsy and keeps injuring herself and as she narrated this to me , I tripped over a pencil like object. And I continue to do so even today. Pretty consistent, eh?

 From the above post, you might have realized I am completely out of topics and also brain cells. But I want to write. Why? Because I love to.

I have also come to the conclusion that you may inspire people and be super nice to them but some people lack decency and courtesy. I used to, am and always will continue to tell people to pursue what they love but it’s people like these who are just ruthless with their words and intonation that piss me off. I hardly express it and bubble inside. I wish I could erupt on them like a volcano .

Probably I should shut up now.

Ok bye!

-Appiqué <3  

Queen - Women's day delight!

Hey there!

I’m going to apologize first because I’m typing under the influence of some heavy duty drugs. Mafi de do!

Today is weird. I have so many topics I could write about in my app, but I just don’t feel like. It’s one of those days when you want to and you can’t because your body isn’t lending any support. Mumbai’s weather is getting weirder by the minute, one moment it is bright and sunny and wonderful and the other minute it is windy, chilly, pull-out-your-sweaters-and go-into-deep-slumber kind. It is soooooo weird.

That and probably food from creepy stalls has led to me falling ill after a looong time!

So you know what body, I’m going to write! (Insert tongue sticking out emoji)

I watched Queen yesterday; bollywood movie- Queen featuring Kangana Ranaut. I think she’s gorgeous but whenever I see her perform at any award show or watch any of her movies, I can absolutely not make out a single word of what she is saying. Ever.

But Queen has got to be the movie where her performance surpasses all her previous performances.

And the cherry on the cake was I was watching it on “women’s day”. It’s such a feel good movie.

The movie revolves around how a woman who gets stood at the altar, in her case- mandap, decides to get on the plane and go for her honeymoon holiday, ALONE; such amazing scenes, splendid performances, great looking cast and a cute lil’ script. It was a fully patakha packed desi movie.

Now I’m no critic (so this might be an opinion that only I have about it) and don’t want to be one because I personally dislike those film critics. You absolutely cannot just make some people sit and decide how a movie is. Everyone has different tastes in movies. Some like the serious type, some like no brainers. Critics just suck the desire out of people when they give a movie a star or two. I mean who lets you decide! It has often happened that they give No-brainer movies with extremely forced comedy 4 stars and 2 to really good ones.

It’s just like food: give a European some Indian food; he’s going to die because of its “Spiciness” which to a normal Indian would be “bhaiya kitna meetha hai”…

It’s ridiculous, this critiquing business.

Anyway so queen ends with some beautiful messages:

1. Nice people are in every nook and corner of the world.

2.  To get past a terrible incident, you’ve got to push it out of your mind. You cannot hold on to it and wait for happiness to come your way. Move on.

3.  Let go of yourself.

4.  You are strong. Never let anybody tell you otherwise.

5.  You don’t need a relationship to be happy in life.

6.  You can find true happiness in anything. Just keep your eyes and arms wide open!

That’s it for today! I can write no more! Thank you for reading.

-Appiqué <3

Awkward pictures

*Clears throat* eh ahem (long,wayyy toooo long)
We've all been there. You, me, your siblings, parents, uncle, aunty, gajju phupha, rinku masi, all of us!We all love a good photograph of ourself. Infact if someone clicks us in the angelic light, we cherish (read brag about) that photo long enough to make that photographer a hell of a local star to an extent he starts googling the price of a dslr and starts a photography fan page of his own.

"A picture is worth a thousand words" for this gen x translates to " a nice DP is worth a hundred likes"  right?  Besides pictures are a terrific way to reminisce about the past, the amazing things we did or we were a part of. (Though on a serious note, the best memories are the ones with no physical record because you'd rather be "in" the moment than be looking for ways to preserve its glimpses for the future.)

So now that we all agree that pictures are awesome, why is it that we suddenly become so self conscious when someone tries to click our picture? Don't tell me you don't get all fidgety and start rummaging through your bag for last minute touch-ups or just your hair to see if something's stuck in it! Don't tell me you don't contemplate all the possible smiles and angles before deciding one. Well if you don't, then you have some splendid amount of confidence which is amazing and also a knowledge of the fact that you are photogenic.
As far as we, the lesser ones are concerned, we try to do everything we can, to look decent in pictures.
And hence there are these : types of posers.

1. The "Snob":
These are the ones that believe they don't have a photogenic smile. So they always keep a straight face in pictures. Some may even prop up their eyebrow(s) making them come across as a very strong/full of attitude person, when on the contrary they might be very down to earth .

2. The "constipated"
Also known as "in deep pain" , as the name implies, these have a very fixated smile. It looks as if it's stuck with the help of glue or is photoshopped. These look like they accidentally sat on a chair with a screw or they've being holding the contents of their bladder for too long, but are being forced to smile. 1 and 2 are the most common poses people land up in while at the studio, when clicking a picture for the id card or passport.

3. The "line"
Their smile looks like a line. They have this serene looking face and a line smack in place of their lips. In India,  it's commonly known as a " netaji/politician" smile. It's also a smile you'd have if your kidnapper asks you to smile.

4. The " hyper reflex" syndrome
He/she will pose and what a splendid pose it would be. But right when the button is clicked, bammm! They'll move/jerk/fall/sneeze. And not a microscale movement, a megascale one! They are the ones that have a picture of their hair instead of them, or a hand or a leg floating,  or some whitish patches instead of their head in the pictures. Generally their movement is strong enough to cause fellow posers to get distracted and fall off too. They have the reflex of a freakin' ninja.

5. The diva
Most girls fall under this. When a person has had his/her share of horrible pictures,  they generally sit and calculate the permutations and ccombinations until they come up with an amazing pose. And when you point the camera at them, *tadaaaa * they transform into a celebrity. You can see imaginary umbrellas, curtains, fans/blowing machines and dslrs and tripods with touch-up dadas around them! The smile's fake but what the heck, it looks hella stunning!

6. Typical expressions
All girls are guilty of having tried atleast one of these.
  - Duck face

- smoochy face

- puppy eyes

- the tongue

  - the tongue unplugged

  - the side view thinker/philosopher (side view selfie)

- the selfie with a peace sign

 - the  rock sign

and the most common,  extremely girly pose " the lean on one side pose"

7. The "sabhya"

(yes stock image- couldn't find anything decent-errrr)
Sabhya in Hindi means civilized, very courtly. A sabhya poser is a person who goes out of his/her way to show he/she is decent. Perfect "mair-age photu" material. Hands forming a knot on the front side, a namaste pose, a little bent posture.. Yes our prospective groom and bride in disguise, bhaiyo aur behno!
And last but not the least,
8. The "photobomber"

He is probably not a part of the frame. He is probably on another planet in another dimension. But as soon as your camera goes "kichkyaon" he suddenly materializes! And how.. Wonderful expressions- pig face, racist faces, clown-y actions!!! He just swoops the attention away from your to-be-dp. And in a way that you cannot crop him from the pic. It's so traumatizing. Girls will sob over the loss for days!

So those were my top favourite posers. There are many, but I'm out of categories to put them in. If you are an Indian, browse through your parents' marriage album, especially the reception pictures! I guarantee you'll have some fun spotting the above mentioned specimens! And we too are a part of the hoarde. But these are the pictures that get etched in our memory, that nickname-atize us!

So cheers to the pictures, the inventor of the camera, the person who thought of this and to technological advancement. Before I trail off into another topic , signing off :-P
  - Appiqué<3

Epic pic!

I would definitely post soon. For now just a picture I really liked. I've seen too many posts on facebook and have always had this urge to comment in a similar manner. But thankfully none of the people in my list are that screwed up. A little, yes but definitely not too much. -Appiqué<3

Types of readers:

Hola!
(Warning: Long post)
I've a friend in my class who lives close to my place.  We generally catch a train together as we can keep each other company. She is an avid reader and is very eloquent. By very, I mean VERY. She's one of those people that will strike you as someone who is amazing at articulation without having to use hi-fi words. So we generally talk about books,  games and comics and end up either wanting to swap stuff or sharing the same opinion about one.
So as we were coming back home one day, we were talking about the Shiva trilogy. I see a lot of people carrying it and I've always been inquisitive about it. So as she proceeds to tell me, we are very abruptly interrupted by a school girl (probably 16 yrs of age) who starts narrating the story to me. She throws in a few fancy words, tells me she recommends reading that book and also a few other novels. And we have this dumb expression on our faces and if we had the ability to see each other's thoughts in those bubbles they show in comic books , it would read " What just happened and who the hell is she!"
While I really commend her confidence, I must say she was weird and her opinion, completely unasked for.
Which got us thinking and talking about the types of readers . Ofcourse, all after reaching our destination.
(POST BEGINS HERE :-P)
Type 1. The clan-beings:

 v/s






These are the people that are die hard fans of any world famous series of books. Most popular clans are potterheads or twilight freaks. These don't just claim,  but are really into the novels. They don't just read them or watch the movies, they live it. They get pissed if they find a scene from the book missing in the movie and almost die from a cardiac arrest if they spot a mistake. They are a part of a huge family and get all teary eyed on spotting someone of the same clan.
These are the ones that get into heated discussions and sometimes fierce arguments on social forums comparing 2 book series.( If you cried when the series ended or when you bought the last book, then welcome to the clan. )
Type 2. The thesaurus-rex

           

These are people who "believe" they have a vocab as huge as a dinosaur. Hence, the name. They will throw in random heavy duty words and complicate simple sentences just to intimidate others. Initially you will be in awe of their vocabulary, but soon you might come to realize they are like the thesaurus option of Microsoft Word, because at times.. They will just fail to make sense. They might also mention " Wren & Martin" so many times you'd be forced to believe they are parenting kids named Wren and Martin. The members of this type will also throw in famous foreign authors and their famous novels- Tell them you haven't read it, your impression drops.Tell them you haven't heard of it, that's it- game's over for you. The look on their face will be enough to send you into a guilt coma for about a decade.
Type 3. The "keeps it simple"

These are people who are fun to be around. They enjoy simple books. You don't need to impress them with a vocab right out of Webster's dictionary or with gibberish titles. Throw in a few jokes, keep the novel light hearted and there, you have a new fan.
They neither take the book too seriously, nor the critics. They have their fair share of fun and then " chalte bano" with it.
Too much of decor( artsy words) and they will not come back to your novel.
Type 4. The "under your bed, behind the mask"

These people breathe thrillers and spooky novels. Horror gives them their daily dose of adrenaline rush. These were the ones that were fond of goosebumps as kids and have now graduated gradually to world famous murder mysteries. If they read the books closely and carefully, you'll notice they have a stunning vocabulary.
Type 5. The "Bestsellers only"

These will know about various bestselling books. They know the name, the author's name,  the prologues and the epilogues by heart. Story?- uhm who cares. These four things are enough to impress fellow members of their kind.








Type 6. The " undercover reader"

These are the underdogs, the dark horses of the reading world. They've read books you haven't enough heard of. All because they keep an open mind and are ready to read any book of any genre whose storyline they find appealing. They will never show off, sometimes not even mention that they are readers. Their libraries are full of gorgeous books the world has failed to notice.








Type 7. The " NNRI- non Nri"s

These are Indians who resent the fact that they are Indian. Bollywood-ugh, chaat- ugh, desi- ugh, Chetan Bhagat- double ugh.
They will not mind reading( read buying) a not so good "phorain/Umreekan" novel,  but desi- tch tch. These are people who look down upon the talent our Indian authors have.




Type 8. The " Comic" ers

These are like clan-beings. They too have a global family and a huge social circle. But are generally not looked upon as readers. Well, they are. These follow comics way too seriously. Like sitcom-freaks. They also have a soft spot for a specific character that they relate too. Commonly seen freaking out about Comic-Con. From tintin to superheros, from local tinkle to universally adored Archie's... Everyone's a part of this sect of the reading world.








Type 9. The " Rome and the antics"

These are rom-com-ers.
These might love " Mills&Boons" or "2 states" but romance is what they are looking for. Put  a guy, a girl and a few accidental contacts,  seal it with a Kiss and there, they will be in the book's hangover for days. Ever felt the tingly sensation, the butterfly feeling in your tummy! If it's not stomach infection, then it's definitely because you are one of the romantic freaks. You love how a practical version of a fairy tale ends with a "happily ever after" tag and you desperately want to step into the lead character's shoes. Some may even like the tragic endings-for e.g." I too had a love story" or " love story".
That's it for now ( seriously, THAT is it???) .
Yes I know toooo long eh? But what was I supposed to do, these are the types and there are many more-All deserving their share of recognition in the reader's club.

So until I come up with more types,
  - Appiqué <3